The UAFC

'A hangover is the wrath of grapes' Dorothy Parker

I almost got hit by a DFI salt lorry tonight.

"You b@stard!" I shouted through gritted teeth.

I hear Iain Henderson was at the opticians and was surprised to find he had one eye bigger than the other …

armalig wrote: ↑Fri Mar 24, 2023 10:41 pm I hear Iain Henderson was at the opticians and was surprised to find he had one eye bigger than the other …

Excellent

Couldn't sleep last night so I tried reading the dictionary.

Didn't finish it though. I got up to P ...

Vladimir Putin suffers a massive heart attack and goes straight to Hell.

After a while, he's given the morning off for excellent conduct and returns to Moscow, where he visits a bar and orders a Vodka.

"Tell me, do we still have Crimea? Putin asks the barman. "Yes." the barman replies. "And the Donbas? Do we have the Donbas?" "Yes," the barman answers. Putin orders another drink and downs it in one, and takes a deep breath "And Kyiv, did we get Kyiv?" • "Yes," the barman answers looking slightly confused. Putin orders another Vodka, and downs it in one with a smile. "How much for the drinks?" He asks happily. The barman replies, "15 Euros. "

Tempted

Spain. 1 lionesses 0

There is a God in heaven who has just saved us from 4 years of ear ache

rumncoke wrote: ↑Sun Aug 20, 2023 6:40 pm Tempted

Spain. 1 lionesses 0

There is a God in heaven who has just saved us from 4 years of ear ache

True equality. The weemin have proved to be just as annoying as the blokes.

I see Prince William didn't bother his hole making the trip down under to support them. Can't see that happening if the Lions had been in their world cup final.

Sheep dog pups for sale …. Come buy

My wife is always complaining that I'm tight with money so yesterday, to surprise her, I treated her to afternoon tea.

It was very exciting as she had never given blood before ...

The happiest man in Dublin on Saturday night ?


Paddy power - nearly every rugby double and treble bet rubbished

ITALY beat Scotland

And

England beat Ireland

Every cloud has a silver lining

Some of you may be encouraged to learn that my neighbour is still having regular sex at 80!

It's handy because he only lives at No. 76

I have a friend who did something Similiar but he sold 80 and moved into 76

big mervyn wrote: ↑Sun Nov 19, 2023 12:14 pm My wife is always complaining that I'm tight with money so yesterday, to surprise her, I treated her to afternoon tea.

It was very exciting as she had never given blood before ...

SPOILER ALERT

First time donors get a cold drink. (at least they did when I gave my first pint back in 1977)

Cap'n Grumpy wrote: ↑Tue Mar 12, 2024 10:37 pm

big mervyn wrote: ↑Sun Nov 19, 2023 12:14 pm My wife is always complaining that I'm tight with money so yesterday, to surprise her, I treated her to afternoon tea.

It was very exciting as she had never given blood before ...

SPOILER ALERT

First time donors get a cold drink. (at least they did when I gave my first pint back in 1977)

I'm on about 200. Can't recall the refreshments for No 1.

All different in Ireland back in the day - tea, coffee or Guinness

https://www.rte.ie/archives/2020/0402/1 ... lood-bank/