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ASK THE EXPERT

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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby Russ » Sat May 10, 2014 1:28 am

BaggyTrousers wrote:
LadyP wrote:Why do men have nipples?


Quite obvious M'lady, so weemen have something to lick when they are being................... FFS Lady P this is a family show.


Wheyyyyyy Bagster! Fecking hero

Roll on the feck9ng draw so we can get Gatlanded!

Is there a team in Liverpool? They have this weird system where before you enter you barter drinks prices

I got us 24 beers, 3 bottles of champers and 48 shots between the 3 of us. Pays to be trained as a London trader

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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby BaggyTrousers » Sat May 10, 2014 1:33 am

big mervyn wrote:If there are 6 million bicycles in Beijing, why do the Chinese never win the Tour de France?


The correct answer is that despite almost numerical certainty that they will prevail there are two issues:

1) The average Chinaman is more interested in opening a carry-out in Bangor that winning the TdF.
2) It may sound racist but the average Chinaman is physically disadvantaged, unpalatable but true.

Anyway, Katie Melua rides one so thats less than 6M.

Of course there is another answer, maybe they are just shyte on a bike.
Support the team and coaching staff. Forget the rest,BUT NEVER MOVE ON.

FIRFU - FU'CK YOU ONE AND ALL, CAVING IN TO SPONSORS, SACKING THE INNOCENT FOR A FEW DOLLARS MORE, SHAMEFUL BASTA'RDS. YOU'VE LOST MY SUPPORT & I HOPE MORE ULSTERMEN & WOMEN
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby BaggyTrousers » Sat May 10, 2014 1:36 am

Russ wrote:
BaggyTrousers wrote:
LadyP wrote:Why do men have nipples?


Quite obvious M'lady, so weemen have something to lick when they are being................... FFS Lady P this is a family show.


Wheyyyyyy Bagster! Fecking hero

Roll on the feck9ng draw so we can get Gatlanded!

Is there a team in Liverpool? They have this weird system where before you enter you barter drinks prices

I got us 24 beers, 3 bottles of champers and 48 shots between the 3 of us. Pays to be trained as a London trader

Sent from my Crozier


I just woke up from a semi-drunken sleep Russ & discovered I'm fecking 60. born 10.5.54, lovely night with my wife and weans, more to come over the weekend.

I intend to party like two 30 year olds. :thumleft: >happyparty
Last edited by BaggyTrousers on Sat May 10, 2014 1:37 am, edited 1 time in total.
Support the team and coaching staff. Forget the rest,BUT NEVER MOVE ON.

FIRFU - FU'CK YOU ONE AND ALL, CAVING IN TO SPONSORS, SACKING THE INNOCENT FOR A FEW DOLLARS MORE, SHAMEFUL BASTA'RDS. YOU'VE LOST MY SUPPORT & I HOPE MORE ULSTERMEN & WOMEN
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby Russ » Sat May 10, 2014 1:36 am

BaggyTrousers wrote:
Russ wrote:
BaggyTrousers wrote:
LadyP wrote:Why do men have nipples?


Quite obvious M'lady, so weemen have something to lick when they are being................... FFS Lady P this is a family show.


Wheyyyyyy Bagster! Fecking hero

Roll on the feck9ng draw so we can get Gatlanded!

Is there a team in Liverpool? They have this weird system where before you enter you barter drinks prices

I got us 24 beers, 3 bottles of champers and 48 shots between the 3 of us. Pays to be trained as a London trader

Sent from my Crozier


I just woke up from a semi-drunken sleep Russ & discovered I'm fecking 60. born 10.5.54, lovely night with my wife and weans, more to ccome over the weekend.

I intend to party like two 30 year olds. :thumleft: >happyparty


I'm 25 you cheeky Warren Gatland

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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby big mervyn » Sat May 10, 2014 8:04 am

Have a good wan Baggy.

Top Tip - a quick sex change will now get you an age related discount on your new seat in the stands!
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby Cap'n Grumpy » Sat May 10, 2014 9:26 am

BaggyTrousers wrote:
big mervyn wrote:If there are 6 million bicycles in Beijing, why do the Chinese never win the Tour de France?


The correct answer is that despite almost numerical certainty that they will prevail there are two issues:

1) The average Chinaman is more interested in opening a carry-out in Bangor that winning the TdF.
2) It may sound racist but the average Chinaman is physically disadvantaged, unpalatable but true.

Anyway, Katie Melua rides one so thats less than 6M.

Of course there is another answer, maybe they are just shyte on a bike.

...... Or that there simply aren't 6M bycicles in Beijing - Katie Melua was wrong! :roll:
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby BR » Sat May 10, 2014 9:44 am

big mervyn wrote:If there are 6 million bicycles in Beijing, why do the Chinese never win the Tour de France?


Their bikes are in China! The clue's in the name, it's Tour de FRANCE! What would it be doing in another countr ... Oh wait a minute ...
Last edited by BR on Sat May 10, 2014 9:52 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby Russ » Sat May 10, 2014 9:47 am

Im so hungover

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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby Mac » Sat May 10, 2014 9:47 am

Image
>happyparty
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby Kofi Annan » Sat May 10, 2014 9:59 am

My cake for Baggy Begs

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image.jpg (85.47 KiB) Viewed 369 times
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby Gary » Sat May 10, 2014 10:22 am

If someone's got you a birthday cake, Baggy, tell them to just stick a 60 watt light bulb on top. Saves on the candles.
Anyway, Happy Birthday oul han'!
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby shamalicious » Sat May 10, 2014 10:43 am

Have a good one old boy. May's a good birthday month ;-)
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby Wee Woman » Sat May 10, 2014 10:55 am

Many Happy Returns Baggy, so you are one year younger than my Mum LOL.

If it's any consolation, she says 60 is grand and she also loves her bus pass. Embrace it!

Great cake Kofi :lol:
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby Cap'n Grumpy » Sat May 10, 2014 11:46 am

Where does an expert go to for help when he's old and past it?

(or just acting like a pr@t)?

:duck:
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Re: ASK THE EXPERT

Postby BaggyTrousers » Sat May 10, 2014 12:37 pm

Here by the looks of it Grumps, much advice offered by al yousuns, some of it even half sensible.

One doesn't maintain an athlete's body by eating cake dears, no no, my particular malformed body is shaped by a love of Arthur's finest and the Breakfast of Champions. :shock:

Celebrated my last fifty-something day by making a feed for the family & drinking copious quantities of wine. Watched some Acoustic at the Beeb thing followed by the Stones at Hyde Park, singing every word. That's what us old people call a good night in and bed at 5.30 was much needed.

I am confidently expecting a "surprise party" this evening and heading out for a feed tomorrow night, sure feck it, you're a long time dead, I mightn't have too many left, may as well make the best of a birthday weekend.
Support the team and coaching staff. Forget the rest,BUT NEVER MOVE ON.

FIRFU - FU'CK YOU ONE AND ALL, CAVING IN TO SPONSORS, SACKING THE INNOCENT FOR A FEW DOLLARS MORE, SHAMEFUL BASTA'RDS. YOU'VE LOST MY SUPPORT & I HOPE MORE ULSTERMEN & WOMEN
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